Jaisalmer by train

Due to popular demand, or at least a popular demand of Matt's, we found ourselves the lucky recipients of return train tickets to the mystical town of Jaisalmer. The delights of third class travel in a 'sleeper' were heightened when the latrines became a part of our regular nocturnal activities and were suitably sprayed by Marty in an ill fated attempt to blast pure sin in the general toilet area and managed to deposit a load some way above the normal squat position. Routine retching commenced and continued long into the night. Chris tried his charm and lack of Hindi on a self appointed guard trying to secure a passage on the roof - the benefits included ready access to a toilet however warning bells generally begin when an Indian with no teeth, pants and hygiene decides a request from Chris is a bad idea. Arriving in Jaisalmer wiser and a good deal lighter we hitched into town and settled on an old palace of sorts that had the promise of beer and ashtrays in the centre of town for the nights ahead. Dirk and Chris, yet again, shacked up in the royal love nest whilst Matt and Marty could only imagine the Karma Sutra sound effects that would penetrate the walls designed to keep torched Pakistanis quiet. Feeling that the trip needed a little something extra it was decided to blow a considerable amount of cash on three crook camels to see an equally crook sunset. Chris managed to bring up the rest of the food from the train in a few thundering seconds much to the delight of the locals - a ready spectacle for conversation and village food for a month - always the Samaritan. The trip then took a downward turn. The fort was lame as no one with a monthly period was allowed to enter the temples - Dirk and Chris were disappointed and naturally missed out. They did take this time to pray for each other and Matt also said a quick word of thanks managing to prove he only had PMT. Marty had left his tampons at the hotel which was a stroke of genius. Not for the first time this trip had we marvelled at his forethought. To be fair, until this point, we were facing a total of 22 hours on a train for vegemite toast from an aussie cafe. Matt then dug deep. Beers and a swim at a posh hotel. The kids (Chris and Dirk) threw the ball for hours and giggled loudly when a fat German woman with wobbly bits walked past...boys. Matt and Marty discussed poetry and politics, and after a few beers also giggled at the German. We had not seen a European woman in a while and it was obviously time to move on. With towels suitably placed we made our exit. Jaipur beckoned and another train latrine needed to earn its keep.

(Ben Martin)