Bangkok II

I am slightly surprised at how much I enjoyed Bangkok and surrounds ... the opening line to "El Scorcho" setting the soundtrack for the city (OK, it's not Japan, but the sentiment holds - Hi Costo). Every 5m there is a Tuk Tuk driver offering discounted fares if only he can take you to a local Buddha/Jewelry Shop/Suit Shop/Ping Pong Show on the way. Aside form the Tuk Tuk drivers and Thai gurls tho - the thing that most impressed me was the cool scooters (that's not shallow) .... I imagine you could drop over and buy a container load of classic Hondas and Vespas to ship back to Aus thereby funding your own classic bike and Thai scooter holiday (anyone???)

The bus to Cambodia failed to pick me up .... as i had already decided to visit Laos + was in danger of becoming a turbo tourist I decided to give Cambodia a miss and satisfy myself with the scale model of Ankor Wat at the Grand Palace of Thailand :( ... the quality Nokia picture says it all, actually, the following 19th century notes by the French explorer Henri Mouhot probably says it a whole lot better:
"One of these temples—a rival to that of Solomon, and erected by some ancient Michelangelo—might take an honourable place beside our most beautiful buildings. It is grander than anything left to us by Greece or Rome, and presents a sad contrast to the state of barbarism in which the nation is now plunged."

.... next time

Bangkok

Bangkok smells like a city. I booked a room at 'your place' and was amazed at its homeliness, cleanliness & location all for $10 including breakfast .... i was still reflecting on the great deal when Anna, the tall Buxom 40yo staying in the room next door, introduced herself, and in the course of the conversation offered to give me a massage - since she looked like a local I assumed that it was a business proposition & queried the price .... "500Baht, 1000 for the works" she offered while sticking her finger into her cheek through her mouth and then continuing to explain. That was the best 30 bucks I've ever spent ... only joking, it was a terrible waste of money ..... hmmm, actually, i had fortunately organised to check out Thai boxing with another tourist so ran out the door.

The Thai boxing was the first time I realised i got ripped off in Asia (& it's the realisation that hurts) - $50 for ringside seats seemed steep enough & that was before we realised it was a split bill, our tickets were only valid for the runts, locals paid about 10%, and the crowd was thin (the majority tourist suckers like ourselves) .... one guy was carried off in a wheelchair and another on a stretcher - so at least the fights were intense. As we left we encountered the crowd for the real fights, including the Thai championship, and walked away with a slightly bitter taste in my mouth and the din of the real crowd ringing in my ears ... headed home to my place where Anna was lying in wait.

Anna invited herself into my room and proceeded to play with my cards on the floor ... after a couple of games of Blackjack i realised she had been beating me using the oldest trick in the book - clothing minimisation ... I made the excuse that I better go maintain my Blog & that's where this whole thing originated.

RATM

The trip from the Perhentians to Bangkok was comparatively simple and trouble free - a couple of military guys with machine guns sitting behind me on the train being the only sign of the Muslim insurgence that prompted the travel warning for the SE Thai region - i thought that wasn't too bad considering the conductors uniform looked like it came form North Korea.

The Train to Bangkok revealed the Asia Id imagined I would see earlier - set in the swamps lining the tracks along the way are slums constructed of sticks, stones, old bike tyres and rusted scraps of corrugated iron - Thailand's per capita GDP is about 75% of Malaysia's, however, it looks as though the distribution is far worse.

The masses of advertising scraps integrated into the slums provided some food for thought along the way .... a poor indictment on society that the scraps of advertising - not the product itself or even material used to distribute the product - is the unintentional and inefficient support provided to the worlds poor from some of the worlds richest companies - an interesting juxtaposition. Perhaps someone should produce coffee table book comparing corporate headquarters and the slums integrating the advertising from the same companies. Just read No Logo.

At the end of the train trip the slumvertising had had its effect so i re energised with some KFC.

Perhentian Islands

It somehow took almost 24 hrs to get from Taman Negara to the Perhentian Islands - 2 trains, 4 buses and a boat to get somewhere maybe one hundred kms away (at least partially my fault) ... the effort, however, was worth it so I decided to extend my stay and learn to Scuba dive.

The Islands are currently all that tropical islands should be ... including being laid back and low on development (the only way to turn off the light in my bungalow was to remove the 20W globe). Although the local government is doing something to maintain control (apparently taking to a couple of illegal stores with chainsaws), it looks as though the Islands will suffer the same fate as many others - the laid back appeal will strangle itself (there is currently a project that will double the accommodation on the quiet each on which i stayed).

One of the strange things i found here (and in other places since) is the inability to grasp niche markets or diversify - it seems each restaurant has exactly the same menu, like wise all the snorkeling trips run the same 5 reef deal ... kinda sucks... almost have to buy Malay food on the black market!

(My camera broke while at the Perhentians, kinda liberating, so future photos will be of the Nokia variety)

Taman Negara II

Heavy rain the night before the trek ensured the leeches were out in force - eventually worrying about the leeches was causing more pain that actually getting bitten by the suckers (kind of like Roosevelt's "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself" but not quite as profound)so I donated my blood to the jungle through at least 10 bloated leaches (Note: Wet tobacco is said to be the best deterrent ... some tried with marginal success)

The Walk was great, and after it all I had seen Snakes, Wild Boar, Monkeys, Bats, Komodo Dragons, Water Buffalo, Bear footprints & Elephant Crap + swung into a river on a vine & slept in a large bat cave frequented by tigers and elephants .... all sounds a bit Indiana Jones really, however, there was a pasty white French girl who did the walk in brand new gumboots.

(Bugger, it just started bucketing down & I’m riding a scooter)

Taman Negara

Fortunately Transport and accom was easy to find in Jerantut (even @ 2am) affording a couple of hrs rest before the 2hr long boat trip into Taman Negara - a virgin jungle (reputedly the oldest in the world) in the heart of the Malay peninsula. Cruising up the jungle lined river was possibly the highlight of my time in the region - particularly the following day when the boat powered up seemingly unnavigable rapids.

A quick afternoon canopy/lookout walk with Faye (an English girl I met on the boat) seemed to have gone awry when we stumbled across a nomadic tribe on the path we were ... umm .... sure ... was the way back, though giggling at our hopeless tourist requests for "village" and "river", some children nevertheless were cautiously keen to be photographed.

We continued on as the sky darkened, regretting that we didn't take nearly enough water, a torch or a map (or even note the name of the village at whgich we were staying) and had just turned back and to try another track when the sound of the long boat motors signalled that we were not so far from the river/village after all. I was tempted to excuse my poor bushmanship by claiming Dad was a computer geek that would not allow me outside our property fence ... however, this would not not account for breaking 6/9 of the recommendations on the large sign i noticed later at the start/end of the walk.

Singapore 28/4-6/5

Well, i have officially started Blogging, i am still not sure why ... cybergeekchic?... more likely because I am in Bangkok and the hooker staying in the room next door was sitting on my floor playing cards ... more about that later, ill start with Singapore and see if i can catch up to myself (don't hold your breath).

Singapore is a nice and soft landing into Asia (especially when your staying with family+ having a maid on hand made it feel surprisingly like 44), a capitalist friendly government with few natural resources & the large and influential expat community seem to have ensured westerners can stay in Singapore without experiencing too much culture shock (though a fair bit of cultural ambiguity).

I enjoyed spending time with Adam, Ange, Jack & Isla (Jack's gurl) - visiting Ange's School, wandering Singapore city, wakeboarding in the diesel between Singapore and Malaysia, watching live comedy (the gay Indian comic was particularly taken with Jack ... much to his delight;), attending a service of the 14,000 member New Creation Mega Church and generally hanging around the house.

Adam seemed intent on proving to me that a Golf R32 is not redundant in the island/city/country by screeching throughout the streets, swerving around anything slower than his +50% interpretation of the local speed limits, and Ange was intent on making sure I actually organised some of my trip (fortunately).

Unfortunately even Ange's handwritten notes, ph numbers, guides, maps and net shortcuts couldn't save me from reading blink and looking into Implicit Association Tests - check them out, interesting stuff on association with race, colour, weight ... the George Bush one is just funny(https://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/australia/) ... er, whoops there i go again .... consequently i jumped on a train to Jerantut (Malaysia) hoping I'd find a taxi and a place to stay when I got there at 2am (sorry Ange - didn't want u to worry)